A thousand words
by BellatrixAmaria
Summary: Lily writes a heart filled letter to Harry two nights before her death... And then one too James...Then Sirius...Then James steals her paper and Lily Plots to kill him in his sleep.. R&R Please? Thanks!
1. Chapter 1

Dear my darling Harry,

I guess I wrote theses letters for my own sanity and I wanted you to grow up, knowing that a part of me can always be found in your heart, your fathers and in this letter my advice for anything will be here.

It's October 29, I've just laid you down for the night. I thought I'd take the time I've got free until your father returns from work to do this simple letter, To stop myself worrying that you were to grow up not knowing that I loved you dearly, I'm sure you're father has told you many of a time how much I love you and how proud I'd be...But nothing is like really hearing it and seeing the eyes that love you so dearly and feeling the pride as they kiss you. I know that from first hand experiances.

I'm sure your father will tell you all about me, But I also want to tell you about myself, my life and how you have given it a new purpose.

So, Me... I was a Muggleborn witch, When I got my letter I wasn't so shocked as I should of been, odd things happened during my life and I thought that there was always something...Different about myself and being a witch solved that difference. I was pleased to be honest, I was amazed as well...And my sister, My dear sister Petuina...Well, She was jealous.

So, Me and your father met on the very first day of Hogwarts and I hated him, Full on daggers in his back hated him. Now, of course I can't understand how I could of hated the man I'd die for now...But I guess my younger self had her reasons. We both became head boy and girl in our last year and thats when I knew, That's when I knew I was utterly mad for him and I wanted nothing more than for him to ask me out, Which he took his time doing of course, Asked me out every day for 5 years and then takes nearly a full term the last.

Okay, So advice is what this letter is supose to be about and I've given none so far, I've rambled and tried to save time, Time that I know I don't really have...I do hope James lives..I'm sure he will.

My advice to you, My son...Look after yourself, be my brave little boy and look after Daddy, Cuddle him...Be there for him because your loosing a mother but his also loosing a wife... I love you both dearly so look after one another for me and promise to stay strong for each other, My darlings.

I can't carry this letter on anymore, You're father is home and you're waking up...Good bye, my baby..

Be safe Harry.  
Be strong.

Forever in your heart,  
Mum. X


	2. Chapter 2

Dear my darling James,

You say I'm being stupid writing letters to people worrying that I won't be there to tell them how I feel, But I'm not. I'm being a worrying mother and that's your fault.

I wanted to write this letter to tell you how much, I love you. How much you've changed my life and how wonderful it's been...And that I wanted to say thank you, For giving me Harry, For giving me a beautiful baby that we will both treasure, Each and every moment with him.

Each and every moment with you is amazing James, You make me feel like I'm on top of the world and my legs are dangling off the edge and I love that feeling...I love that uncretinty that fills my lungs and stomach whenever we did something new, I love that your arms feel like home to me. I love that I'm yours.

I know that life for us was never going to be a smooth ride, two people so different but conected so deeply, I remember when you asked me to marry you, I thought you was breaking up with me and I sat there and cried, I can't remember how long we just sat there in each others arms before you whisped, "So much for a romantic prospal, Huh?" I could of gave you everything I had there and then, I felt wanted. I felt needed.

I guess life just got better from there, You got a job, I got my degree, We brought a beautiful home, We got married, I fell pregnant with Harry... That pregnancy wasn't an easy one, I get why Sirius never came round, I get my Remus held a shaking hand that had a bar of chocolate it in it now, I was a moody bitch, But you stayed by my side and kissed me goodnight and told me you loved me, that meant the world to me, I love you.

I know that when Harry was being born, Sirius passed out, So did you. What did you even see? I guess I won't ever know for sure, But Sirius never has looked at me the same...I love you all, We love our Harry...

Harry, God if anything happens to him I won't forgive myself James, I won't, Please promise me you will look after our baby, Fed him, Stop him crying, Change him properly without that look on your face, Make him feel loved in every single way like I know you will do.

And most of all..

Tell him I love him every day.

James, My darling. Be strong for me. Be strong for Harry, I know times will be hard and I'm sure you're going to greive for me, I'm sure it's going to be a struggle and I know your marauders will be there for you and Harry...But Harry is our son, His our boy, Look after him.

James...His lost a mother, He can't loose a father too.

My love forever and always,  
You're wife, Lily. X


	3. Chapter 3

Dear Sirius,

Writing this is breaking my heart because I know that I'm never going to hear that stupid jokes of yours, see that lopsided grin and see the way your eyes light up when your with James and Remus and now even my little Harry, I'm never going to have a bone breaking cuddle from the brother I was never given and your never going to see me pregnant with the little girl you want to be just like me but with James's prankster tricks, There isn't going to be a brother and sister like you and James, There isn't going to be anything anymore because there isn't any one there for us to do it with, I'm not going to be here anymore and James will be grieving so I'm asking you one last favour, As a sister that needs her big brother.

James won't cope, I'm sure he is going to try and stay strong and be the brave man that I married, But I know his going to be breaking inside and he won't show it to any one, His going to be a mess...

I needed someone to know why I wrote theses letters, What's to stop James from doing something stupid and us sharing a grave? The thing is Sirius, I know his coming for Harry. Not for me. Not for James, For my little boy, My Harry. He wants him killed, wants him gone...I'm going to give my life for his, I'm not letting my baby die, Not without putting up a bloody good fight, I can't stand by and let this happen, What sort of mother would that make me?

Sirius.

Be Serious...

Look afer the two men in my life, Look after James, Make him open up and look after our son, Harry will need James and he is going to try and be so brave, But Harry needs him. I need him to be there for our son.

Sirius, I love you...Do this for me.

Missing you always,

You're little petal.  
Lily. X


	4. Chapter 4

Dear Harry, My son.

I STOLE YOUR MOTHERS PAPER! DON'T TELL HER FOR GOD SAKE! Oh my god...I bet she's reading this and plotting about killing me in my sleep...SON HELP YOUR LOVELY DADDY! Okay...Help...Me...And Don't tell her if she's not reading this because she will then have no reason to kill me!

Right, Back to the letter stuff...

Harry, I've asked Dumbledore to give you this letter when your older enough to understand...I'm hoping I'm the one giving this to you, And you're asking me why am I giving you a letter? Well, If It is Dumbledore that gave this letter to you, That means the worst case senarios happened, that means I'm no longer here, As much as it pains me to think of leaving you...That might be the case.

Anyway, Harry. I just wanted you to know how proud myself and your mother are of you, Even if we aren't there right now, Doesn't mean were not their full stop, it means were in your heart.

How we wish we could be there for you, To wave you off on your first trip to Hogwarts, To wave you back home and cuddle you as you stumble off the train, To show you how to ride a broomstick to show off when you're on one in flying lessons, To be waiting at the other end of the quill to be told you're in Gryffindor, There is no doubt in my mind though, You'd never be in any other house, You're a POTTER! Potter means Gryffindor.

Stay strong, Kiddo. I'm sure that it's been tough without us around,but I know you will manage, Sirius has promised to keep an eye on you for me, and I trust Sirius with my life. You'll do great Harry. Don't ever forget that we are always here if you need us.

Dad.


End file.
